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Shoes shoes shoes! - Making Peace With The Past And Moving On

Dear Readers,

I think this may actually be the last completely soul-based post from me for a while.  Although this is primarily a soul care blog, I feel that a big part of taking care of your soul is looking after your health and environment also and so that is going to be the focus from now on.

 I have really enjoyed these past few years, writing articles about the soul and personal development recommendations relating to it, but if you dig around in the roots soul just like the roots of a flower it's gonna get messy and you will end up coming across the same root sooner or later. At some point, a flower needs to break through the ground and start reaching for the sun, and at this point in my life, so do I.  Before this happens though I do have one final lesson I would like to share with you.

Time For Another Story

For the last few years, I have felt like I'm walking around the same old routine with certain issues and decisions in my life. 

I kept on making the same mistakes over and over again I basically was acting like a clown, attempting to walk in shoes that were far too big for me.

How that looked is, I  was chasing a dream that was not only way bigger than me, but also not really my dream. 

I was living the life I thought would gain the most approval because I had a huge problem with conflict and not being liked and I really didn't think much of myself.  Recently, I tripped over my clown shoes and hurt myself so much I decided it's time to put them in the bin.
[caption id="attachment_1364" align="aligncenter" width="230"] Enough clowning around![/caption]

The next pair of shoes I put on was the running shoes. I had a "let's get stuff done" kind of attitude. 

I enrolled in a bunch of courses, set up a new business, got a new job, sorted out my home life (sort of) and made a decision I was going to do everything I could to turn my life around, it was great for the most part. 

There are some great lessons to be learned from running the race that life presents you, however, I have never been into sports, and again I tripped over my shoe laces and found myself face-down wondering what I'm even doing with my life.

That leads me to the high-heals.

I now hold myself to a much higher standard then I did previously, I don't believe in beating myself up about things, but at the same time, I will not accept less than working towards being the best version of myself either.  

High heels can be painful, and it does take a little while to learn how to walk in them and even when you have mastered it, you can still fall over if you don't watch your step. It's the same with life. 

Holding myself to a higher standard is a good start, but getting consistent and watching  I don't slip up is an entirely another thing.
[caption id="attachment_1366" align="aligncenter" width="254"] Lady on a mission![/caption]

With all of this in mind, I got to thinking, what's the number one thing that could give me the potential of falling over? 

When I got really quiet and honest with myself, I realized that the one thing that had led to a majority of my past mistakes is that I was refusing to make peace with my past.

I treated certain people in my life with less respect then they deserved because of past hurts relating to those people. 

I had walled up, that not only stopped people from really getting to the core of Hayley as a person, but also kept me locked in a very lonely cage with a big black dog called Jet (depression) standing watch as gate-keeper.

I listened to a song recently by Matthew West, called the list, and then as if by divine intervention the same thing was recommended in a book I was reading.  

The concept is that you write down every mistake you ever made, or every event that ever hurt you and then you add a one-word emotion or short phase to each thing, you do this all the way through your life right up to where you are now, and then you make a conscious decision to forgive and release the people on the list, rip it up and move on with your life. I did this and I have to say it was one of the most freeing things I've ever done!

Before you put on a new pair of shoes, you have to first take off the old ones. 

In this case, those old ripped up shoes is the past. Make peace with it because if you don't just like a zombie it will come chasing you with the intention to ruin your life.

Old shoes, hurt, they are falling apart, they don't serve us anymore. 

The only place for them is the bin, it's the same with our past. Forgive for your own sake, make a decision that the past is gone and today is a new day and start working towards the future you want to have. 

Yes, memories will still come up from time to time, but once you have made peace with your past, it's strange, those memories don't really hurt anymore, they just were, but are not apart of your life and that's okay.  

It's okay to not be perfect, it's okay to have regrets and mistakes and things we rather forget, we all do but carrying that stuff into your future will ruin it.

You don't need that baggage so let it go.

Sometimes yes, counselling and/or professional help is needed to properly put things to rest, there is nothing wrong with that, but at some point there comes a time where you can't talk it through anymore then you already have and it's time to accept that nothing you do or say will change what has happened. It's time to let go and move on and you are absolutely worth that.

Also, remember that there is nothing stopping you from doing better in the future, learn from the past, then let it go.

So in closing, I highly recommend that you make peace with your past and find a pair of shoes that fit you. Your soles and your soul will thank you.

Catch you next time guys,

Love Hayley