Monday 18 November 2019
London It Is Then..Part 2 - A Huge Personal Milestone & Direction Of Daisy Change From Now On.
Saturday 21 September 2019
Authentic Faith: The Trans Trap ( Help For Families Of Transgender Individuals)
Conclusion: The Trans trap is taking care of others to the point you're neglecting your own needs.
I did that, the results were disastrous. Here's how to not make my mistake.
To start, I don't care if you are LGBT affirming or not, this isn't about your loved one, this is about you because let's be honest, the help that is out there for the family and friends is severely lacking.
I should know, I have a transgender sibling and you know what?
Sometimes you have to say it how it is, even if you don't like the language coming out of your own mouth. Even ladies are human and need to give in to that sometimes.
I'm writing purely from experience and hell of a lot of research because I think it sucks that there isn't much real help for the families of transgender individuals.
If you want to skip my story skip this next section in green.
Certain personality traits are universal. It's hard to see the person but no matter how much they say they are the same, they just aren't in your eyes. It's a complicated issue that we families of transgender individuals know all too well. Cue THAT SIGH...
As long as it makes them happy is the mantra of the age.
Also most counselling really just tells you how to relate to the person and seeks to MAKE you accept it.
Even starting that journey for some feels like betraying who they are because accepting something like transgenderism is not easy.
They called themselves a believer, how though?
Jet, my black dog, brought friends I didn't even know he had, to dance on the grave of my clarity.
I've spoken to a lot of members from the LGBTQ+ community and so I feel justified in saying the following things to try to help others like me attempting to navigate your walk with Jesus but still loving your trans relative, if you want to or not. We don't just stop loving them because they are going through this. ( and working through the dark thoughts and emotions that come for us, family members)
What's left unsaid but so felt, is this means you feel like don't have a right to feel upset about all of this. People in this camp can't see your pain because they are too blinded by the rainbow lights, they call God's love.
Yes, the real one.
Sin and trauma are and hear Me now...
NO RESPECTER OF PERSON.
GET IT STRAIGHT!
So I'm not going to with mine.
My issues with LGBTQ+ are all based around the pain it causes.
I don't really care at this point if there is a cure
If my sibling will ever change back
I don't care about the stance people take, especially in the church on either side.
That is truly between them and God.
Besides, it's too damn painful to care anymore!
I truly had to let go and let God.
What I do care about is the fact that the pain that people impacted by LGBTQ+ experience is very real and should be acknowledged and treated with respect on all sides.
I trusted God not to drop me
and here I was, convinced I was sinking!
I was dealing with all of this emotional garbage on the inside and I was angry to be going through yet another trauma in my life.
I was thrown into a turmoil on the inside that seeped into my entire world and eventually led to me being so drunk on grief I made some really dumb decisions. I got duped by so-called good and even Godly people and ended up empty, with a broken spirit and an empty bank account.
( that how I lost my domain name for Daisy Change, sorry guys I dropped the ball)
Let's make a cup of Twinings tea,
this is getting a little intense, let me change the mood.
Fancy a Mcvities biscuit?
So how to do you start to deal with the pain of having a transgender loved one??
1. By being honest about how you really feel,
and then go look for answers.
2. Keep getting up every morning, and let time do its thing.
4. Don't blame your loved one for this.
They have enough to deal with as is. Gender dysphoria is confusing, painful and you're loved on is likely to be feeling extremely lost and lonely right now.
5. Take care of of your loved one and family best you can, but please don't neglect your own needs.
There are even cases where couples break up because one of the parties doesn't want to be associated with the other crazy family.
There are so many unintended consequences to this whole thing. That is why I firmly believe that transitioning is not the quick fix advertised and therefore should be the last case scenario because of the impact on all parties involved is intense. I say that not to guilt-trip anyone. but just to give you all the facts I can. So go searching for all the answers you need to figure out what your own life looks like now. You need to feel comfortable in your own skin.
The best thing you can do for yourself right now is learn to love the truth, but be balanced enough to keep leading the joy life.
Maybe this post I wrote a while back may help.
Friday 6 September 2019
How To Truly Be Happy ( You've most likely never heard this before)
Short Version
People that chase happiness will never be happy for very long because it's more about the chase than the object in question.
Not sure you buy that?
Want to know what to do instead??
Keep Reading.
Happiness is an emotion, it comes and goes because life is up and down. Chasing happiness usually leads to unhealthy people with dead dreams and more debt then they know what to do with!
What I am against is, the idea that life is all about happiness, that we should be aiming for it in every area of our lives and if we don't somehow that makes us a failure and if we can't hold on to happiness, well then that is even worse!
Follow me on Insta for more like this.... |
Chasing happiness will never bring fulfilment.
It will lead to frustration.
Even if you are fulfilled in a job or relationship, you are still going to get your down days, but that deep knowing that what you are chasing is right for you, regardless of how you feel right now, will help you to stick it through the rough patches.
You will make it to the mountaintop.
Yes life still throws stuff at us, but from personal experience I have learnt that I am happy a lot more of the time by living this way because I am doing the things I love and I have no doubt if you started to chase fulfilment too, you would be happy a lot more by default too.
Conclusion
Chasing Happiness is a rabbit hole!
Building a fulfiling life, and shooting for a legacy that could even change the world, even if only in a small way.
It may take some time and require more of you but in the long run, it's far more worth it.
Personal Opinion Incoming! (faith section of this post)
Nothing is more worth building than the kingdom of God.
In future posts, I intend to use my expertise and experience to show you how.
It's not what you think.
I'm not going to preach at you, but if you clicked on a post with the cross then I'm guessing you are a person of faith or at least looking into it.
Authentic faith does not look like cookie-cutter Christianity!
I know sheep bite.
You likely know the generic wisdom of pray and read your bible and go to church
I know you are looking for something real
A life that is displayed authentically, without the polish and the show real.
You likely know the generic wisdom of pray and read your bible and go to church
I know you are looking for something real
A life that is displayed authentically, without the polish and the show real.
Chase fulfilment without God if you like but I personally believe that you need Him in the equation if you truly want to lead a life that matters.
A life that leaves a legacy.
I believe this is achievable through chasing fulfilment through something I like to call simple temple living.
Tune in tomorrow for the next post to learn more about it.
Monday 19 August 2019
Apostate
Apostate.
Friday 16 August 2019
The Witches Confession
The Witches Confession.
They say Christian witches don't exist, but surprise here I am!
Fancy a bottle of oil, a prayer cloth?
Some Holy wine?
For a price of course!
If this didn't make me rich,
Do you really think I would be a witch?
The power is my drug!
The devil's just a thug!
Who says I can't play with his toys?
I thought you said I could do anything through the strength of Christ.
If I'm really honest, when I'm alone at night.
I know I've embraced Jezebel.
You see I need protection from all the bugs.
They say raped not ruined but have you seen my life?!
It's been so tragic, so full of strife.
So what else is a girl to do?
I'm safe now, you can't take this girl boss crown!!
I'm a witch on a mission,
and the last thing on my mind is submission!
Copyright Hayley Esther 16.08.2019
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