Showing posts with label mental health. Show all posts
Showing posts with label mental health. Show all posts

Great Books For Savvy Artists.

So I talked it over with the king, and we've decided that there's something to be learnt from recent events. One tiny little lesson before I give you what you came for, our book recommendations for savvy artist's life and business. I read a lot so I have a lot to say in just a moment but before we get there.

It doesn't feel right to overload my awesome readers with content after such a heavy post like the last post. Click here if you didn't see it.

So instead of that, we have decided to put out today's post celebrating world book day, then leave posting for a while to give time and space and respect to our loved ones currently grieving.

Hope that's cool with you guys!

Anyway, 's let's get on with it, shall we?

I have decided to put this in 3 sections and there are roughly 12 books in all. Again I remind you pretty much all of these are affiliate links, this means that we may make a little tiny commission if you buy any of the books we suggest, but this will be no extra cost to you. It basically just means we get more jaffa cakes and hot chocolate to keep churning out content to inspire and encourage you guys.

Sound good?

Great!


Our First Section Is Life


Ok, guys, the whole point of these books is to help you be a better you. A better you will likely be able to produce better art. Get it?

Quick note, there's nothing wrong with the you, you are now, but we as humans are always moving towards something, it may as well be something better.

Here's the list.

Off-Balance On Purpose - Dan Thurmon I believe that work/life balance is a myth that can interfere with our art. Dan explains what's better to do instead of trying to balance things. 

Shut Up, Stop Whining, and Get a Life: A Kick-Butt Approach to a Better Life This book was life-changing for me. If you are fed up of fluffy little self-help books and need something with a few more nuts to chew on. This is your book. Loved it! Still, live by many of the principles in this book.

Calm - Fearne Cotton  If you want something a little more gentle then Fearne Cotton has got you covered. All of her books are fab, but this is my favourite.

Feel The Fear And Do It Anyway - Susan Jeffers This was such a good book that really helped me get over myself so that I could just get on with getting my art up online. It's been one heck of a journey ever since, and I owe that in part to the lessons and simple writing style of the late, great Susan Jeffers.

Our Second Section Is Business

This is my personal favourite section and narrowing this down to just 4 was hard, but here's the best of the best when it comes to business books.

Craft a Creative Business: Making & Marketing a Successful Creative Business This is such a good little handbook for all artists wanting to sell their work.

She Means Business: Turn Your Ideas into Reality and Become a Wildly Successful Entrepreneur Pretty self-explanatory. Enjoy the surprise.

Small is the New Big - Seth Godin  - Seriously if you haven't read any of Seth Godin's books you should! Bonus because I can't not include it Linchpin that book revolutionised my business!

Secrets of Closing the Sale by Zig Ziglar It's been a hot minute but from what I remember, it's pretty good.




Our Final Section Is Art

So for this section, the listings are not going to be explained because I want to list a fair few and I know that these books will impact different types of artists in different ways. Enjoy guys! 


The Simpsons Handbook Secret Tips from the Pros 

How To Draw Comics The Marvel Way

How To Draw Stupid And Other Essentials Of Cartooning By Kyle Baker

Manga Martial Arts: Over 50 Basic Lessons For Drawing The World's Most Popular Fighting Style

The Animator's Survival Kit (Paperback) Richard E. Williams


If you like my style of books, please come follow me over on GoodReads

Move From Moving On To Moving Forward

Moving on and moving forward,

 they are the same thing, right?




Well actually no.

Once you have chosen to see life as seasonal and started chasing fulfilment rather than happiness, the next step toward success is moving on from moving on.


Let me explain.

Moving on gives the impression you’ve buried the past and now you're going to build something new on its grave and pretend it never happened. Moving forward is acknowledging the past, for what it is , learning what you can, and then deciding that it doesn’t define you and your still going to move forward with your dreams and in life because nothing can hold you back. You won’t give anything permission to do so. Good on you!

You can move on from things and still not be over it, but hiding from your feelings is not going to help you. If you bury half-open wounds then poison will fester beneath your scars. You gotta make sure that you’re not running from your yourself. Trust me it’s exhausting and only leads to making laps around the same old mountains over and over again and those scars won’t fully heal. If you build on the grave of a wound such as this,then zombies from the past may grab your heels and pull you down. 

I know it can be hard to face certain things that lurk back there, but you don’t have to do it alone and in the long run, dealing with and owning your stuff will be good for you. Even if you decide that what lurks back there is gone now or too painful and you're not going to give it much thought beyond forgiving all that need it, including yourself, giving it to a higher power and being more aware of the good things in your life and letting time do its work. It’s still important to make the decision and at least let yourself know what you have decided. If you feel the need to reach out to someone, then do it. There is no shame in asking for help, it’s actually really brave and a very loving thing to do for yourself.

Once you have done this, you will be ready to move forward in life and that is awesome on so many levels!

So then let’s get you on to another level with a plan!

Today you get a little bit of homework

Firstly, have a look in your heart and see that you have not buried your past alive, no one wants to get chased by zombies! 

Secondly, write down your dreams, even if they seem completely unrealistically possible. 

Write them down anyway or better yet, why not make a vision board? If you can visually see the goals you're shooting for, then it gives you motivation to actually do the work to get there.Pinterest is perfect for this.

If you're into the idea of self help, then here's a couple of really cool bits and pieces that may also help you move forward, not just move on from where you are right now. I can not recommend the first highly enough! Game changer!

The other two are just useful and nice to have, and it doesn't help that they are super cute! With the third one, those stickers are so adorable, I have so many and use mine all the time, but the idea is that happy planner stickers is what I recommending, they help me stay motivated and I am sure they can help you get stuff done too! Quick reminder the below are affiliate links, I may make a small commission with no extra cost to you if you decide to buy any of the things I recommend. 

The Five Minute Journal: A Happier You in 5 Minutes a Day
(Again,can not recommend highly enough)

Motivational Gallon Water Bottle  - especially good for helping you to keep on track with your fitness goals.

Paper House Planner, Journal, Dairy, Notebook Assorted Colours - highly recommend journal stickers in general, doesn't have to be these ones but these are adorable and so sweet!


That's about it today.



Got a complaint or a comment? Let me know below and let's all together grow! 

Self-love for Bloggers

Dear Awesome readers,




I strongly believe that we are all three-part beings. 

We are spirits, with souls living in flesh cases called bodies. Your spirit and soul live forever, but your body does not.  This belief guides what I am about to say below, but you don't have to believe this in order to get the point of what I am going to share with you, I've just included my own belief for background purposes.


This is a concept I like to call simple temple living. 
This is based on the idea that we are 

OK, with that said let's jump into today's post.

Let's start by defining what I believe about each element of our three parts. I could be wrong, but this is how I understand things.

The Soul - Designed for connection with others, we are relational beings. It is also the centre of our emotions and if we hurt inside it's usually the soul that feels the pain.

The Spirit - The essence of you, your passions, creativity and desire for something more comes from this part of us. It is designed for connection with a higher power ( God) spiritual things that happen to us are often more real than this earth's reality. We are designed for relationship without a creator because we are created in his image, and this is the part of us that cries out and hears from God.

The Flesh - The car, or whatever transport you want to call it, that gives us movement and the ability to physically feel in this world. The bad side of the flesh wants what it wants, it is selfish and has no interest in a higher power, it hates waiting for things and has many sinful tendencies. 

If we have a relationship with God, this part of us will never ever want to have anything to do with it. If we allow this part of us to take the reigns of our lives and do what it wants, we will always end up in a mess somewhere along the line. 

The good side of the flesh is our body, it's not wrong to look after our bodies, in fact, it's really important that we do. Our bodies are the house for our souls and spirits and the first part of us the outside world will see, therefore it is really important to look after them, not to mention if we don't look after our bodies we will get sick. We know this, I'm not saying anything that you haven't heard before...but where I am in life right now I need the reminder and maybe you do too.

This, in essence, is what I call  Simple Temple Living.



It is possible to have spiritual, soulish and fleshly desires, the three intertwine and can war against each other within us, however, it is possible to get these three parts of you to get along, the next post is going to focus on how to do that.

For now, though, I think that's about it,

Hope you are all having an awesome day!




How To Handle Hard Times In London When You Are Not Fully Settled


Before we go any further let me just make it clear, there are affiliate links in this post. This is no extra cost to you, but if you click and purchase something via one of my links then I may make a small commission.


Disclaimer :The following post is written purely from experience, if you are going through a hard time and feel the need to do so, you should seek professional assistance from the reverent sources. I am not a doctor, counsellor or therapist, if you choose to take my advise you do so at your own risk. 



I have noticed recently that we have a lot of new followers to this site, so before I get started let me give you a little bit of background.

I am a country girl from South Wales, and my other half is a Londoner. We were a long distance couple for a long time, but eventually, I moved to London, not just to be closer to him, but also because it was better for my well-being, career and overall goals for fulfilment.

London as with any city, is so diverse, and so I've never really felt an issue with being mixed in with so many different cultures, including obviously the English ( The rivalry between the English and the Welsh is stupid in my opinion, but some on both sides disagree with me and so banter is to be expected)

What I have struggled with however, is the fact that many of my loved ones are still back home in Wales, and regardless of where in the world you come from city life and country life are very, very different. Add to this the fact that when I arrived here, I had my own set of issues, due to past traumas, and the fact that life is full of ups and downs, and that pretty much covers the background of what living in London has been like for me.

Don't get me wrong, I love this city!!

This is my London, I have a thing for pigeons, back home I have a nick name related to this,
please ignore the crazy and get the point, this city is awesome!


It just took some getting used to for me. I think that  not being settled anywhere can make harder times even harder, and so the goal of this post is to give some ideas on what I did to settle here. Now when hard times come, I can focus on getting through the hard issues.

I must remind you, the following is just my opinions based on experience. I don't mean to stereotype anyone or London, this has just been my personal experiences, and maybe you can relate. If so I hope the following tips help you out.

Last post we talked about things you need to die to, this time we are going to focus on things you should come alive to. For those of you reading this thinking I need to get better at following my own advice on the following, you are right, so these 5 things are my "putting the tent pegs down" moment.

Here are 5 tips to handing hard times in London when you're not fully settled.


1.Come Alive To Your New Environment

It rarely looks like this at any central tube station, so you have to learn to move with purpose.


London has so much to offer, and if you know where to look there are some great places to go for free. That said the culture of the city is varied depending on where you go. There are some general things that are pretty much across the board. Discussing the weather is considered polite conversation if you are stuck in awkward silences with people, pretty much everywhere in London. Although, due to the fact that London is so big, it's also the preferred choice for most to just get on with things in silence. 

Learn to be the car, indicate with your arm which direction you are going, with minimal eye contact and walk briskly.
Be vigilant. If get shoved you're unlikely to get an apology, and again keep an eye on your belongs pickpockets are real.
People in London, are used to being around diversity on a large scale, and somewhere in that large scale of personalities, there is bound to be a few jokers,  a wide range of scams do go on here. for this reason, it's important to note that people here are not cold because they want to be. It's just that due to the wide range of personalities here, you don't know what you are getting and so on first impressions, the sweetest of gals will appear, ice queens, because being nice can cost too much sometimes.

With this in mind, learn to protect yourself.  Qualify people before you let them into your inner circle, and always keep an eye on your belongings if you are out and about. Oh and one more thing, ladies please learn self-defence, not that you will need it, but it's better safe than sorry. Finally to any Christians reading this, don't share your faith in the centre of London, it paints the biggest target of nonsense on you, and it's not savvy. Think parable of the sower. Be wise.


OK now we have got the harsh realities out of the way, now we can talk about the good stuff.

2. Come Alive To Home Comforts

Home wouldn't be home, without my duckies!
This is just a small thing to help remind me of happy times in my homeland, for those days when I feel a little homesick. 


Due to the fact, London can be a lonely, and somewhat cold place to live, it's really important that you take extra special care of yourself. To do that you should figure out what makes you happy when you are on your own, and lean into it. I personally am a handcrafter. I love making cards, doing project life and making jewellery. I am also an Avon lady, and since joining Avon, I have found that pamper nights testing out products to recommend to my customers, have been invaluable in helping me to brave the day.  It doesn't have to be Avon, but in general taking care of your body will help take care of your mind, soul, spirit and well-being. Also, who doesn't love a good movie/box-set binge night with a lovely box of chocolates once in a while? 

My personal favourite treat is Jaffa Cakes or maybe a little popcorn!

I run this site on hot chocolate and jaffa cakes,
 but hot chocolate is also my preferred drink to chill with when I'm not in the mood for a cup of tea that is.


These seemingly little things make all the difference because in order to truly share the joy with others you first need to feel it for yourself. Find what makes you happy and prioritise spending time doing that even if only for a couple hours a week, it will make a big difference in your performance to the wider world. If you can't find time for this, you got a bigger problem, you may need to reshuffle your schedule, we have a post about this coming soon. 


3. Come Alive To New Opportunities


You got this, so go do it! 

We already talked about taking up solo hobbies, but there are also so many options for taking up hobbies that could lead to new friends. London is very well connected, and if you lack the confidence to go for it like I did when I got here, you can always do a confidence-building course. Udemy is excellent for this.


4. Come Alive To Your Little World


The most accurate description I have heard of London in the last few years come from the movie Paddington Bear. In that movie, they point out that since London is so diverse you really do have the permission to be #uniquenotunicorn as I would put it, and still feel like you belong here.

I have blue hair, but the heart I am a lady and being into both the alternative fashion scene while still being a refined person works perfectly well here. It didn't back home so much. Figure out what makes you, you and lean into it. Let yourself have a few home comforts that remind you of where you came from, this will help you stay grounded and can really help on those homesick days.

Seriously, without my ducks London wouldn't feel like home!


You get to decide what living in London looks like for you. Create your own little world and this safe place will make it easier to handle things when life gets hard. My world wouldn't be complete without music, feel free to go check out my playlists over on Spotify.

5. Come Alive To Living For Something Bigger Than Yourself




This is really about thinking of others, which has been proven to help humans feel fulfilled in life. Figure out what you care about and join your tribe. We are better together, and when you have people around you that genuinely get you and care, it makes so much easier to tackle the to the tough stuff.



I would say I belong to several tribes, but the one that I want to highlight right here is actually the blogasphere. Blogging has been a lifeline for me in tough times and so just to end this post I want to say thankyou to my fellow bloggers, your words have been invaluable, and I truly hope that mine can be just as encouraging.

That's about it for today,










Depression Sucks And So Does This Post (Proberly)

Disclaimer :Since it's the age of triggered, I will give you 3 potential triggers for this post, but if you trigger easy you likely don't wanna read this so see you tomorrow if you come back. 

Potential Triggers: Sucide/Depression /Real Talk




Right guys, let me straight today I don't feel like writing....I don't wanna be a real downer especially now the sun is finally starting to show up around here but I just got a word that a  friend of mine has committed suicide.

At this point, I've just about had enough of getting messages like this, because I've had more in my young life than I care to admit. To be authentic today, I can't in good consciences  (yeah big word and what? I'm so not in the mood to edit myself right now) put up the happy post I was going to do so instead. I'm fighting back!

Depression that is.

I am fighting depression back because it sucks, and while it may be a part of the whole grieving thing. it's also had way too much of my life and time and I'm just done taking it. 

I don't know if this post will help anyone, but if gives someone flirting with jumping off the edge a much needed wakeup call. Good. 

If you are sucidal or depressed today consider this a cold glass of water in your face!




Wake up! We are here and we want to help you!! If you feel like you have no one else, reach out to one of these awesome helplines if you are here in the UK, if not then please google for help in your area, there are lots of great places set up all over the world to help. (this post is not affiliated or paid for by these helplines. I just really trust them personally)

https://www.samaritans.org/how-we-can-help-you/contact-us?gclid=CjwKCAiA2fjjBRAjEiwAuewS_eZ7kaii5D3DGNrIhclVNiuC3H67r6sjnUQhwm5AwIgb1QzkNu9z4BoCLP4QAvD_BwE

https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/suicide/

https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/types-of-mental-health-problems/suicidal-feelings/#.XH9Hy8D7QVQ


Of course, I am gonna be there for my friend's family and I'm sad at the loss of my friend, but I have been hit with depression ,many, many times before and there are so many articles on how I overcame it and fight it when it shows up, right on this site.

Here's a few. If they help awesome! That's why I wrote them. I removed the affiliate links because of the nature of this situation (I can do little more to help my griving friends from a distance and we scattered all over the place)

http://www.daisychange.co.uk/2017/10/be-unique-not-uniform-when-you-hurting.html 

http://www.daisychange.co.uk/2015/05/loosing-friends-learning-lessons.html

http://www.daisychange.co.uk/2015/05/my-secret-to-beating-depression-here.html

http://www.daisychange.co.uk/2015/06/the-running-shoes-suicide-depression.html

The thing is though guys if there is one take away from this sad time and day is that when life hits us, it's up to us how we choose to take the hand we get dealt. My friend made a perment decision that transfered his pain to all of his loved ones and he didn't reach out. He carried his pain alone, even though he didn't have to.  If you feel like he did just know that life is worth living and there is hope, never loose sight of that, suicide is damn destructive to all those left  behind! 


No matter how bad the pain is, it gets better in time trust me. 

My advise to all of you is if you are grieving today, that's okay, but this season will pass in time.

There's the generic statement, now for something more meaningful..

It's also totes okay to feel really rubbish even when the sunshine is out!

Your emotions are valid. You matter and you are worth taking care of, especially when you are hurting. Never forget that, and go fight to win at life like you mean it, because it's the only one you get and it won't last forever. (again, I'm not editing myself today)

Okay that's it for today. Enjoy the posts I did way back when, they probs have way more value than this.

Take it easy guys!



Got a complaint or comment? Let me know below and let's all together grow!



P.s If I'm not up to writing anymore this week. I won't. I have to take care of my own heart and I only want to publish content of value. Hope you guys understand!



How To Handle Hard Times In London When You Are Not Fully Settled


Before we go any further let me just make it clear, there are affiliate links in this post. This is no extra cost to you, but if you click and purchase something via one of my links then I may make a small commission.


Disclaimer :The following post is written purely from experience, if you are going through a hard time and feel the need to do so, you should seek professional assistance from the reverent sources. I am not a doctor, counsellor or therapist, if you choose to take my advise you do so at your own risk. 



I have noticed recently that we have a lot of new followers to this site, so before I get started let me give you a little bit of background.

I am a country girl from South Wales, and my other half is a Londoner. We were a long distance couple for a long time, but eventually, I moved to London, not just to be closer to him, but also because it was better for my well-being, career and overall goals for fulfilment.

London as with any city, is so diverse, and so I've never really felt an issue with being mixed in with so many different cultures, including obviously the English ( The rivalry between the English and the Welsh is stupid in my opinion, but some on both sides disagree with me and so banter is to be expected)

What I have struggled with however, is the fact that many of my loved ones are still back home in Wales, and regardless of where in the world you come from city life and country life are very, very different. Add to this the fact that when I arrived here, I had my own set of issues, due to past traumas, and the fact that life is full of ups and downs, and that pretty much covers the background of what living in London has been like for me.

Don't get me wrong, I love this city!!

This is my London, I have a thing for pigeons, back home I have a nick name related to this,
please ignore the crazy and get the point, this city is awesome!


It just took some getting used to for me. I think that  not being settled anywhere can make harder times even harder, and so the goal of this post is to give some ideas on what I did to settle here. Now when hard times come, I can focus on getting through the hard issues.

I must remind you, the following is just my opinions based on experience. I don't mean to stereotype anyone or London, this has just been my personal experiences, and maybe you can relate. If so I hope the following tips help you out.

Last post we talked about things you need to die to, this time we are going to focus on things you should come alive to. For those of you reading this thinking I need to get better at following my own advice on the following, you are right, so these 5 things are my "putting the tent pegs down" moment.

Here are 5 tips to handing hard times in London when you're not fully settled.


1.Come Alive To Your New Environment

It rarely looks like this at any central tube station, so you have to learn to move with purpose.


London has so much to offer, and if you know where to look there are some great places to go for free. That said the culture of the city is varied depending on where you go. There are some general things that are pretty much across the board. Discussing the weather is considered polite conversation if you are stuck in awkward silences with people, pretty much everywhere in London. Although, due to the fact that London is so big, it's also the preferred choice for most to just get on with things in silence. 

Learn to be the car, indicate with your arm which direction you are going, with minimal eye contact and walk briskly.
Be vigilant. If get shoved you're unlikely to get an apology, and again keep an eye on your belongs pickpockets are real.
People in London, are used to being around diversity on a large scale, and somewhere in that large scale of personalities, there is bound to be a few jokers,  a wide range of scams do go on here. for this reason, it's important to note that people here are not cold because they want to be. It's just that due to the wide range of personalities here, you don't know what you are getting and so on first impressions, the sweetest of gals will appear, ice queens, because being nice can cost too much sometimes.

With this in mind, learn to protect yourself.  Qualify people before you let them into your inner circle, and always keep an eye on your belongings if you are out and about. Oh and one more thing, ladies please learn self-defence, not that you will need it, but it's better safe than sorry. Finally to any Christians reading this, don't share your faith in the centre of London, it paints the biggest target of nonsense on you, and it's not savvy. Think parable of the sower. Be wise.


OK now we have got the harsh realities out of the way, now we can talk about the good stuff.

2. Come Alive To Home Comforts

Home wouldn't be home, without my duckies!
This is just a small thing to help remind me of happy times in my homeland, for those days when I feel a little homesick. 


Due to the fact, London can be a lonely, and somewhat cold place to live, it's really important that you take extra special care of yourself. To do that you should figure out what makes you happy when you are on your own, and lean into it. I personally am a handcrafter. I love making cards, doing project life and making jewellery. I am also an Avon lady, and since joining Avon, I have found that pamper nights testing out products to recommend to my customers, have been invaluable in helping me to brave the day.  It doesn't have to be Avon, but in general taking care of your body will help take care of your mind, soul, spirit and well-being. Also, who doesn't love a good movie/box-set binge night with a lovely box of chocolates once in a while? 

My personal favourite treat is Jaffa Cakes or maybe a little popcorn!

I run this site on hot chocolate and jaffa cakes,
 but hot chocolate is also my preferred drink to chill with when I'm not in the mood for a cup of tea that is.


These seemingly little things make all the difference because in order to truly share the joy with others you first need to feel it for yourself. Find what makes you happy and prioritise spending time doing that even if only for a couple hours a week, it will make a big difference in your performance to the wider world. If you can't find time for this, you got a bigger problem, you may need to reshuffle your schedule, we have a post about this coming soon. 


3. Come Alive To New Opportunities


You got this, so go do it! 

We already talked about taking up solo hobbies, but there are also so many options for taking up hobbies that could lead to new friends. London is very well connected, and if you lack the confidence to go for it like I did when I got here, you can always do a confidence-building course. Udemy is excellent for this.


4. Come Alive To Your Little World


The most accurate description I have heard of London in the last few years come from the movie Paddington Bear. In that movie, they point out that since London is so diverse you really do have the permission to be #uniquenotunicorn as I would put it, and still feel like you belong here.

I have blue hair, but the heart I am a lady and being into both the alternative fashion scene while still being a refined person works perfectly well here. It didn't back home so much. Figure out what makes you, you and lean into it. Let yourself have a few home comforts that remind you of where you came from, this will help you stay grounded and can really help on those homesick days.

Seriously, without my ducks London wouldn't feel like home!


You get to decide what living in London looks like for you. Create your own little world and this safe place will make it easier to handle things when life gets hard. My world wouldn't be complete without music, feel free to go check out my playlists over on Spotify.

5. Come Alive To Living For Something Bigger Than Yourself




This is really about thinking of others, which has been proven to help humans feel fulfilled in life. Figure out what you care about and join your tribe. We are better together, and when you have people around you that genuinely get you and care, it makes so much easier to tackle the to the tough stuff.



I would say I belong to several tribes, but the one that I want to highlight right here is actually the blogasphere. Blogging has been a lifeline for me in tough times and so just to end this post I want to say thankyou to my fellow bloggers, your words have been invaluable, and I truly hope that mine can be just as encouraging.

That's about it for today,










The Devils Tool Box - The Hammer of Fear

The next tool the devil likes to use to distract us from moving forward in life is the hammer of fear. 

Fear can come in many different forms. 

It can come in the obvious form of worry, anxiety, paranoia or even the not so obvious little worries we get about the smaller things.

I'm not going to say too much about this one because if I got into this topic to deeply, I don't think I would know where to stop, so rather then going into detail about how fear works and what we can do about it.

I'm just going to state the 3 main lessons I have learnt about fear and then give a source list so that if you want to do further study you are aware of some of the resources available.

Please note these lessons are about fear in a negative sense.


I know that fear can still be good and even protect us sometimes, but I am talking about the unhelpful side of fear in these lessons.

 Lesson 1 - If you give fear space to grow it will.

Fear usually starts out as a thought in your head, the more you think on it the more it grows, before you know it a small worry has turned into something much bigger and in some cases, it can leave you paranoid and terrified, even sometimes for your very life.

 Lesson 2- The best way to get over your fear is to face it.

Fear is a tricky one, if you don't deal with it then it holds power over you.

There is that age-old decision between fight or flight, and in most cases, the flight is the best option.

If you are in danger then yes you should get out of that situation and in that regard, yes flight is the best option.

However if you're not in danger and the fear is of something else like for example, fear of being rejected for the job so you just don't try in the first place, then that is not helping you in the long run.

The main fear that most people have to deal with is the fear of the unknown.I'm not going to elaborate on this point any more but once again, I do suggest Susan Jefers Book, Feel The Fear and Do it anyway.

 Lesson 3- Fear is usually just a shadow.

Joyce Meyer, a New York Times bestseller and excellent teacher, has a very tragic story. She has suffered abuse and in many cases, had the right to be afraid, but she had learnt that Fear is only a shadow and often states that Fear is easily explained by this False Evidence Appearing Real.

The fact is, half the things we are afraid of will never actually happen. Our minds are battle Fields and if the devil can get us to be paralysed by fear then he can get us to accept his lies as we looked at in the previous post.

 Lesson 4- Fear never works alone.


Fear has a little brother that it likes to take everywhere it goes.

This little brother's name is doubt.

Together with fear and doubt, climb into your mind and batter your brain with the constant chatter of "what if" and "why you can't" they sit there to hit your head, just like a hammer hitting a nail.

 Recommended  Resources ( Doubles as the source material for the last few posts)


Joyce Meyer - Battlefield of the Mind
http://www.joycemeyer.org/ProductDetail.aspx?id=000159

Susan Jeffers - Feel the Fear and do it Anyway
http://www.susanjeffers.com/home/detailtemplate.cfm?catID=2234

John 14 : 27 "I am leaving you with a gift--peace of mind and heart. And the peace I give is a gift the world cannot give. So don't be troubled or afraid". - Jesus Christ ( NLT) 

The Devils Tool Box - The Nails of Acceptance

It may seem strange that I'm starting this series by talking about acceptance as a tool used in the devil's toolbox but it does have a good reason for being the first topic looked at in this teaching. 

Accepting things, in general, is not a bad thing, in fact, it is important to accept certain things in order to move forward in personal growth and there are things the devil will try to stop us from accepting. 

However, there are things that if we accept too easily, they will actually stunt our personal growth.

We are going to look at 2 of those things that can cause us to stay stuck by accepting them.

In order to explain this, I'm going to start out by looking at it from the viewpoint of the thoughts attached to each of these things, then explain why and how it is dangerous to think this way and how to move from a negative viewpoint to a positive.

What is important to remember is that the devil is a liar and so each of these thoughts is a lie.

Let's now look at the evidence for that statement, in each of the thoughts we have that keep us nailed where we are in a negative way. 

Let's begin,

Thought that is a Lie 1. Things will never change. - Hopelessness

When things have been the same way for a long time, we often get it stuck in our head that things will never change. 

This is because it is hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel when you're in the middle of it. 

It is very easy to lose hope and just accept that this is our lot in life and nothing is ever going to change so we may as well accept it and deal with it. 

Why is this dangerous? 
This is a dangerous thing to think because it completely limits your mind in terms of thinking of options to getting out of a situation, this can and usually does lead to worry and depression. 

Depression is like quicksand, it will just suck you in further and further if you allow it to do so.

The result of thinking a situation is hopeless is despair. 

As soon as you hit that lower level of despair, it opens the door for the devil to start whispering more lies to you and you are far more likely to believe them. 

It is a long journey to get out of depression and despair and one that often involves a roller-coaster of emotions that are very hard to deal with alone. 

Please don't try to do this alone. If you are struggling, click here. 

How can we change this thought into a positive?
We can change this thought of things will never change into a positive by refusing to believe that this is all life has to offer.

The fact is no matter how hopeless a situation may seem, there are always choices even if the only choice you have is to change your attitude towards the situation your in. 

By choosing to believe that life has more to offer and then committing to doing whatever you can in order to make your life better, one small step at a time, you will start to see little changes. 

The best way to get unstuck when your in a rut, (which is basically another way of staying stuck in the mud or stuck going through the motions) is to change something. 

Even if the something you change is only small, if the routine is really that much of a pain to you, then even a small change will be welcomed.

As you start to make small changes you will start empowering yourself to create the life you want, which in turn will help with convincing yourself that the next statement the devil loves to whisper to you to keep you stuck, is also a lie. 


Thought that is a lie 2. I can't do this because of _______ - Lack of confidence 
If we believe the lie that nothing will ever change, we often also believe that we will never change. This then gives way for this second lie to come in to play.

We magnify all the bad points about ourselves and decide that because of all these negative traits, habits or attributes in us, or any number of external circumstances or factors that somehow we are not going to be able to cope with the situation.

The truth is, under it all. Fear has us under the thumb. 

Why this is dangerous?
Our natural instinct when it comes to feeling uncomfortable is to avoid the thing making us feel that way and so we stay stuck.

Fear keeps us paralyzed and so we wind up overthinking everything and worrying excessively, which has a negative effect on many areas of our lives including our health.

In other words, staying stuck can cause so much destruction that is can actually put your life at risk. 

How can we turn this into a positive? 
In my own life, I can honestly say the only way to deal with fear is to face it. I am sure you have heard that before. It is a tried and tested fact that works in a whole host of situations.

The best thing to do when it comes to dealing with fear is to educate yourself and then face it. 

When you educate yourself on something you don't understand or are afraid of it can make you feel more confident to actually face the fear. Sometimes educating yourself is enough, but that is very rare. 

 An amazing, life-changing book I would recommend if you are wanting to learn how to deal with fear is Feel the Fear and do it anyway, by Susan Jeffers. 

There are plenty of resources out there, you need only do your research, however, no amount of research is going to compensate for the freedom that can only come through facing your fear.

Of course, there are things that you don't have face if you don't want to, not all fear is bad and not all fears need to be addressed immediately.

The question to ask when deciding if this certain fear needs to be addressed is simply how is this fear impacting my life? 


If it is affecting you in a negative way and you could actually say that the fear in one way or another is controlling your life or how you feel about yourself then it is probably best to face it and sort it out. 

Disclaimer- Don't be stupid, use your head, don't break the law to face a fear and always remember to stay safe. Remember that professional help is available if you're dealing with an irrational fear that controls you and it never makes you weak to get help if you need it. 

There is a positive side to acceptance that can actually help with moving forward and the devil will do everything to keep you from accepting 5 simple truths because he knows that if you accept them, you will empower yourself to move forward. 

If you don't accept these three simple truths, you will be equally as stuck as you will be by accepting the negative thoughts already explained. 

5 Truths that we need to accept in order to move forward in life 

1. I may not like where I am now, but I don't have to stay stuck, things can change.

2. I am responsible for my own happiness. Even if I don't have control over my situation, I can still have control over how I react to it. 

3. I am worthy of good things to happen to me. 

4. I don't have to do/face this alone. 

5. My attitude has a direct effect on my result. 

Recap 
  • The two thoughts that the devil likes to get us to accept in order to keep us from moving forward in life are Things will never change and that you can't do this. 
  • Both of these are not true because of it down to choice. Even if the only thing you have control over is your attitude towards a situation. The devil is a liar. 
  • By making small changes, you will start to gain the confidence you need to believe that you can do anything you need to do and begin to see that you don't have to stay stuck. 
For those of you wanting to know where I get my information to write this, a source list will be available at the end of this series.